Love tools, quizzes and date ideas for couples

How to get the most out of these tools

Every tool on this page works on its own, but they are much more fun when you use a few of them together. Think of the site as a small box of games and conversation starters that you can open whenever the evening needs a little something. Some tools take two minutes. Some can fill a whole night. None of them ask you to sign up, and nothing you type leaves your phone or computer.

Below is a simple guide to where to start, depending on where the two of you are right now. You don't have to follow it. It's just what tends to work well.

If you have one quiet evening

Start with the love language quiz. It takes about four minutes, and when you finish you can send a link to your partner so they take it too. Once you have both results, the page puts them side by side and suggests small, specific ways to show love in the way the other person actually notices. That comparison is usually where the good conversation starts.

Then open the couples questions game and pick the Light deck. Take turns answering. When a question sparks something, stay with it. There is no score and no timer, so you can spend twenty minutes on one card if it's a good one. If the mood is right, switch to the Deep deck for the last few questions of the night.

Before bed, spin the date generator once and save whatever it lands on. Now you have a plan for next weekend, and something to look forward to.

If you are just getting to know each other

New relationships are full of curiosity, and that is the best time for light, playful tools. The zodiac compatibility calculator is a fun one to try on an early date, because everyone has an opinion about their sign and nobody takes the result too seriously. The love calculator is even sillier. It's the old playground name game, and it shows its working, so you can argue about the math together.

The Light deck in the questions game is written with new couples in mind. The questions are easy to answer and they tell you a lot about a person without feeling like a job interview. Save the Deep deck for later, when you are both ready for it.

If you have been together for years

Long-term couples often assume they already know everything about each other, and the couples quiz is a gentle way to test that. One of you answers a question about yourself in secret, and the other tries to guess. It's surprising how often a favorite food or a childhood memory has quietly changed over the years.

The compatibility test is a good choice when you want something more thoughtful. You each answer the same 20 questions about money, family, time together, conflict and more, and you also say how much each topic matters to you. The result shows where you agree, where you differ, and which differences are worth talking about. It isn't a verdict on your relationship. It's a map of the conversations that are worth having.

And if it has been a while since either of you wrote anything romantic, the love letter maker will help you get started. Choose an occasion and a tone, add two or three real details about your person, and it puts together a first draft that you can change as much as you like.

If you are in a long-distance relationship

Almost every tool here works well over a video call. Share your screen, or both open the same page, and take turns. The love language quiz and the compatibility test both let you send a link, so each of you can answer on your own phone and see the comparison afterward. The questions game is perfect for the long evening calls where you have already talked about your day and want something more.

A long-distance tip: use the date generator with the "Stay in" filter, pick an idea you can both do at the same time in your own homes, and turn it into a shared date night. Cooking the same recipe, watching the same movie, or reading the same book side by side over a call all work surprisingly well.

If you are hosting a party or a shower

The newlywed game is built for hosting. Add up to six couples, choose a question set, and read each question from the screen while the couples write their answers in secret. The page keeps the score for you, so the host only has to read and react. It works just as well at a bridal shower, an anniversary party or a relaxed game night with friends.

For a smaller group, couples can take turns playing the couples quiz one pair at a time while everyone else watches, and the love calculator is always good for a laugh when friends start comparing names.

Which tools are games, and which are based on research

We think it matters to be honest about this, because a quiz result can feel very convincing on a screen.

• Just for fun: the love calculator is a playground name game, and the zodiac compatibility calculator follows the traditional rules of astrology. Both are fun, both show you how they reached their answer, and neither can tell you anything real about your future together.
• Based on well-known ideas: the love language quiz uses the five love languages described by marriage counselor Gary Chapman, with a balanced set of questions so no language is favored. The attachment style quiz is based on the two dimensions that adult attachment researchers use: worry about closeness and comfort with closeness. These are useful ways to talk about how you love, but they are not a diagnosis.
• Conversation tools: the questions game, the couples quiz, the compatibility test and the newlywed game don't judge you at all. Their job is to get the two of you talking, laughing and learning something new.
• Planning helpers: the date generator and the love letter maker simply help you do something kind for each other a little more often.

A few ground rules that make every tool better

After a lot of playing with these tools, a few simple habits keep coming up as the difference between a fun evening and an awkward one.

1. Answer honestly, not strategically. The quizzes only work if you answer for who you are, not who you think you should be. Nobody else sees your answers.
2. Be curious about surprises. If your partner's answer surprises you, ask about it before reacting to it. "Tell me more about that" is almost always the right next line.
3. Laugh at the silly ones. A low love calculator score is a joke, not a warning. Treat it that way.
4. Stop while it's fun. Five good questions beat thirty tired ones. You can always come back tomorrow.
5. Put the phones down afterward. The tools are a starting point. The best part usually happens once the screen is off.

Seasonal ideas, all year

Alongside the tools, you'll find guides for every season: date ideas for fall and Halloween, gift ideas and cozy dates for Christmas, and plans for Valentine's Day that don't feel like everyone else's. There are also everyday guides, like good morning messages, short love quotes, conversation starters and first date ideas. Each guide links to the tool that goes with it, so if you are reading about date nights you are one tap away from spinning the wheel, and if you are reading about love languages you can take the quiz straight away.

We revisit the seasonal guides every year so the ideas stay fresh, and new tools and guides are added as couples ask for them. If there is something you wish existed, the contact page is the fastest way to tell us.

Is it really private?

Yes. The tools run inside your own browser. When you type your names into the love calculator or answer the attachment quiz, the work happens on your device, and nothing is sent to us or stored on a server. A few tools let you send a link to your partner. In those cases, the only thing in the link is what the tool needs to show the comparison, such as a first name and your scores or answers, and you choose whether to send it. The date generator remembers your saved ideas and filters on your own device so they are still there next time, and you can clear them whenever you like. You can read the full details on the privacy policy page.

Common questions